Swiping Right on Life: Gen Z Perspectives

This week’s episode offers a refreshingly candid and insightful look into the life of a young Zoomer (Gen Z), you get to meet and listen to my oldest daughter, Mackenzie, as she navigates the challenges and joys of living in the bustling city of Washington, D.C. Kristen Daukas, Mackenzie's mother and the host of the podcast, skillfully guides the conversation, exploring topics ranging from the financial realities of homeownership for Gen Z, to the social media-driven pressures of modern relationships and celebrations.

Throughout the discussion, Mackenzie's perspective shines through as she shares her experiences with the demands of her career, the camaraderie of her close-knit group of friends, and the bittersweet feelings of leaving her hometown behind. Kristen's empathetic approach and genuine interest in understanding her daughter's generation create a warm and engaging dialogue, inviting listeners to gain a deeper appreciation for the unique perspectives and experiences of young adults today. 

The episode serves as a testament to the power of open and honest communication between generations and the importance of embracing the diverse paths that define the modern coming-of-age journey. By doing so, we can all gain a deeper understanding and appreciation for each generation's unique experiences and perspectives.

Transcript

Kristen Daukas: 0:00

Kristen, welcome to Conversations on the rocks, the podcast where the drink is strong and the stories are stronger. I'm your host, Kristen daukas, and this isn't your average chat fest. Here. Real people spill the tea alongside their favorite drinks, from the hilarious to the heart wrenching. Each episode a wild card, you'll laugh, you may cry, but you'll definitely learn something new. So grab whatever, what's your whistle and buckle up. It's time to dive into the raw, the real and the ridiculously human. Let's get this chat party started. Hey everybody, it's Kristen, and you are tuned in to this week's episode of conversations on the rocks, and the last episode I had Jen, my bestie, my bestest bestie in the world. Because remember I said, if you think you've got the bestest bestie, you're wrong. But today I have a very well it is actually an unexpected guest, because when she said that she wanted to do this. I was gobsmacked, because she was vehemently against it. And whereas I had my best friend on before, I have on a young lady who gave me the title of mom, I have my oldest beautiful daughter, Mackenzie, and I'm so excited that she's here. Mackenzie, tell everybody? Hey,

Unknown: 1:21

hi,

Kristen Daukas: 1:24

normally, she won't shut up, and now she's gonna give me one word answers.

Unknown: 1:27

Yeah, sure. Why

Kristen Daukas: 1:29

don't you? Why don't you tell everybody a little bit about yourself?

Unknown: 1:33

Okay, I'm 25 years old. I live in DC with like 10 people I know from my hometown, which is insane. I am a catering sales manager at a large convention hotel in DC, and I have a little side gig being like a host, bartender, top master kind of deal. Yeah. I mean, just living my life in DC, she's living

Kristen Daukas: 2:01

her best life, and what we're going to be talking about today is her generation. And if you know me, or if you've listened to this show and don't know me, you know that I am a huge, huge advocate for Gen Z. I am a Gen Xer, and for the most part, Gen Xers birthed the Gen Z and they get a lot of crap. They really do. And you know, I was talking to a friend who when I told her I was going to be interviewing you, and I'm actually going to be doing this the entire month of August. So my entire month of August shows are with Gen Z, ers, one of Mackenzie's friends is going to sit in the hot seat here in a couple of weeks. And my friend said, Why don't you ask them why they don't want to work? And I said, Hold on, that's absolutely not true. Are there some out there that don't want to absolutely but every single Gen Z or I know, busts their ass and they do it. Because, why? Mackenzie? I mean, we have no choice. You have to because one of the things I want you to talk about is your perspective of, you, know, your future. I've said it before, and I truly it makes me very sad to make this statement, but I really, I just can't see the way our world is right now, how you and your sisters and any of your friends will ever own your own house or a condo? I mean, I know you've got one friend that has but that's just she's isn't she, like the only one of your friends that has her own place

Unknown: 3:38

in DC, I have four friends that own, two own, or three of them own in Virginia. One owns in DC proper. I think it's two condos, a row house and an actual house. And then I have a friend back at home who does own a house in Boone. And

Kristen Daukas: 3:58

how does that make you feel? Do you think? Do you think that you'll ever be able to own property?

Unknown: 4:03

I guess it depends on where I decide to like, settle, to like, you know, have a family and live for the majority of my life. But if, situationally speaking, right now in DC, absolutely not.

Kristen Daukas: 4:17

And how do you like big city living?

Unknown: 4:19

You know, I don't mind it. It's kind of crazy. You know, going home from the bars at two in the morning and the Uber you're looking out the window and you're seeing, like, all these amazing monuments and like, just like the city life moving around. I definitely miss North Carolina. I miss the comfort, the Southern Comfort, literally. But I like it, generally speaking, there's a lot for me out here. There's a lot of good opportunity, which is why I moved here. But I mean, you know, there's no place like home, literally. So I would like to live in maybe a more of a hybrid area, where they're a little bit suburbia, a little bit of city. So.

Kristen Daukas: 5:00

So you live in DC, and it is a very contentious area. How did, how do I know that it makes me nervous, as your mom having you live there with all of the unrest, how do you how do you feel about all the political and things going on there, the protests. Do you ever feel not safe? What? What's your take on that

Unknown: 5:29

with the protests? I never like feel unsafe because of them. I do think what happened this past week was absolutely insane, and we there should be no place to that, and this city or America in general, but where I actually like put my head to rest, we don't have protesting over here, over by where I work. We definitely have protests when we have certain events and stuff. So I just have to remember that I am safe due to the security that we employ. And DC police kind of have a control on things, but it's hard to say, because you look at videos from this past week, you see people attacking the police officers, and they're not doing much. They're not able to really arrest people, from my understanding, it's kind of like a it's a no man's land when it comes to that kind of stuff. The only time I feel like kind of unsafe is probably like walking home at night, just what you're not supposed to do. Yeah, that's why we have scooters and Ubers, just because it can, I mean, it's there are crazy people everywhere. I'm grateful I do not have a car with the car jackings. It's

Kristen Daukas: 6:53

everywhere. I mean, obviously in your more populous areas, you're going to hear about it more often, but it happens here in Winston. I mean, you know that you lived here, you grew you know you grew up here. Let's talk a little bit about the technology you being from the 20th century, and not the 21st century. Yeah, she still has, she's a 19 you did not, you know, you're not that you can really remember your first couple of years, but for the most part, a lot of people in your generation have never not known technology, right, right? And you know your your little sister, she definitely, I mean, by that point, we had iPads and laptops and stuff like that. You not so much. We didn't have an iPad when you were little, but that didn't stop you from watching Blues Clues and all those other fun shows in the Power Puff Girls, but it was, you know, with my background, you guys knew that I was always a little ahead of the curve with you and your friends, right? However, there were always little situations. How do you think growing up in the middle of social media and all that technology? Do you think? And you know, there's a lot going on right now on legislation where they're trying to really make it illegal for anyone under 13 to have social media. What's your take on how that impacted you growing up, and the friendships and the relationships that you had.

Unknown: 8:21

I mean, like in middle school, I remember becoming friends with people on Facebook that were friends of friends, which then blossomed into actual friendships. I met one of my closest friends through like Instagram or Facebook, and then we didn't even go to the same school. And then the next year, when we were high school, we met like, we were hanging out, and like, became super close just because of social media. So I mean, I think it's nice for bridging gaps between friend groups and like, you know, friends of friends. So I mean, I think, I mean 13, I mean, I guess that makes sense, but that was more so for I feel like people like my generation, and not the younger people, because now, like these young kids are doing things at like 11 years old that I was doing at like 1314, years old. So I mean, Tiktok has taken everyone by storm. You see these people on there and you're like, oh my gosh, they're like, 11 years old, doing these crazy Tiktok dances, whatever. So, I mean, we definitely didn't have

Kristen Daukas: 9:28

that. What about the negative side of it, like the cyberbullying, um, I

Unknown: 9:32

mean, we had this one platform called Ask fm, which you could, like, send people questions anonymously or put their put your name, but it was more anonymously, and that was, that was probably the worst it could have been for cyber bullying. I think if you're talking like random people cyber bullying, then like you're looking at like Omegle and those chat rooms and stuff. Of but I don't think, like, for me, like Instagram was really like a cyber bullying platform. Twitter was kind of rough. You get in a Twitter fight with somebody, and everyone sees that stuff, and you know, it's still out there to this day, you don't go back and delete it. But I mean, then I think the net, the biggest negative impact that social media has on us is on how we look and societal norms.

Kristen Daukas: 10:31

Let's talk about that. You know,

Unknown: 10:33

it's you see like the Kim Kardashians, the Kylie Jenners on social media. You of course, think they're beautiful and want to look like them, but then it's putting unrealistic ideas into young women and young men's heads, that that's what they have to look like to be accepted by people, or especially, you know, to like be liked by whoever they're desired to be liked by. And it's it's sad for sure, because you see the eating disorders and the mental health disorders come out of that. I mean, we've all been there, been through it.

Kristen Daukas: 11:09

I and, you know, I have a real big soap box when it comes to societal norms. And I think one of the conversations that I'm having with one of your friends is along the lines of, you know, real relationships. And you know, we have, we just found out this week that, apparently, if you are a cat, a single cat lady, it's a bad thing which you are. You're a single, double cat lady,

Unknown: 11:35

two cats, with two cats.

Kristen Daukas: 11:38

And I think that that is just, there's so much wrong with those statements and those sentiments. And you know that I'm a big but I want you guys to find someone you know, well, first of all, you got to be happy with yourself, right? I've always talked to that, and if you you've got to make yourself happy. You can't put that job on somebody else. But at the same time, you know you're not supposed to go through your entire life alone, and it's always easier to have somebody you know by your side to support you. How do you and then, oh, reminds me, I've got another question on this one that kind of segue into this. Do you feel pressured? Do you feel pressured to be in a relationship? Do you want to be in a relationship? I mean, how do you feel about that? Do you feel like society pressures you that you're less than if you're not in a relationship. I mean, obviously they, they do, you know, if you're JD Vance, if you're not married with five kids,

Unknown: 12:32

so I do not feel pressured by society to be dating. Do I want to be in a relationship? Yeah, but, I mean, that's just like, I feel like everybody wants someone so but no, I don't feel pressured by I don't feel pressured by society to be in a relationship. I don't even think I saw that comment from him.

Kristen Daukas: 12:52

Oh yeah, it just, it was just a couple of days ago. Yeah, that that's why you're seeing all the memes now, of like, you know, the the time cover with Taylor with her cats. And, you know, talking about the childless cat lady, like, I don't know, she's doing pretty damn good for herself to be a childless cat lady.

Unknown: 13:12

She's, yeah, she's fine.

Kristen Daukas: 13:15

Oh no, gosh, we could talk about that for a really long time. Okay, so speaking of one of the conversations with my friend who made the why don't they want to work comment, she just recently attended a wedding, and it just kind of made my knee jerk, and I've asked you this. I love your generation. You know that, but why are y'all so extra? Why are you so extra and we'll just use the birthdays as a thing. Why can't you just go to the corner bar and get drunk like we did? Why do y'all have to take these trips? I mean, I love it. It's a great adventure. I'm not judging, but I'm like, you know, if it's a, you know, 25 a five and an O, you know, those are always big birthdays in my book, fives and O's. But like, I mean, I don't call you out. You're doing one for your 26 you're going to New Orleans. I can't even remember. I think I can remember, I got drunk with my friends. That's what I did for my 26th birthday,

Unknown: 14:12

and that's what I'm doing for my 26th birthday, just with different views and more more fun. I don't know. I mean, I am going to New Orleans for my 26th birthday with a group of, like 10 people, and we're starting to potentially, maybe have more people come. We'll see. I don't know what it is. I mean, only two out of the 10 of us have ever been and everyone is extremely excited. We're all very excited. But, I mean, I don't know it's, it's a very specific thing that's really started happening since I moved to DC. It's just, I mean, if you have the time to go and do it, then we're gonna go do it. I mean, pretty much for every birthday that we have, we are renting out. Some sort of space at a bar or restaurant to celebrate and then making another stop along the way before we go home. But I mean,

Kristen Daukas: 15:10

you're making experiences that I mean, I'm not. I'm not making judging yourself.

Unknown: 15:15

You can always make more money, you can always make more memories, and just live by that and but, yeah, I mean, I've had friends ask me to go to Tulum for their birthdays. And, you know, it's like, it's crazy, so, but I'm excited. So

Kristen Daukas: 15:30

maybe not the birthday, but let's talk about the weddings and the engagements and the honeymoons and the stuff like that. Like, I mean, some of these young ladies, these brides to be. They're freaking crazy. I mean, it is insane. How like these bachelorette parties trips? I mean, it's one thing for a trip, but then, and you could probably describe it better than me, you know, there's outfits of the day. There's got to be a color you can't do. Talk a little bit about that, because that is madness to me.

Unknown: 16:01

I mean, I, I feel like, like, 10 years ago, obviously, I was 15 years old, and I don't know if that was happening back then, but I feel like it's like a recent thing to have the, you know, the pink pony club event, the we're all wearing white, the breads wearing black, or we're all wearing tan. It's just, if you think about it in a different way, it's kind of helpful for outfits. So at least you know you're gonna have to wear a very specific outfit when every single night. So there's no oh, I don't know what I'm gonna wear. That's a good so I see it that way, like for my what was it? My 25th 24th birthday. My 24th birthday, I told everybody to wear black, which I have to interrupt

Kristen Daukas: 16:50

her real quick. We thought that was going to be the end of because she introduced the entire family, meaning her dad and I, to the concept of a golden birthday. Now it pretty much ticked all of her sisters off because Mackenzie explain what a golden birthday is. A

Unknown: 17:04

golden birthday is when you turn your age on the day you were born. So for me, I was born on September 24 and I was turning 24 on the 24th and it was a Saturday. So of course, we had a huge party. And I was enjoying birthday party, actually, with one of my friends that I used to work at the bar with, and it was both of our golden birthdays. So of course, we had to go all out, but golden everybody

Kristen Daukas: 17:28

else in the family missed it. I guess my golden birthday was when I turned 17. Your dad was when he turned five. Poor Cassie, she's the one closest. I mean, she had hers when she was four, and your Sydney was when she turned 14. But apparently, for those of us that are Gen X, there is an opportunity for us at some point, if we stay alive that long. And what is that? Our platinum birthday? What's it called?

Unknown: 17:53

I would assume so, or like, silver birthday,

Kristen Daukas: 17:56

but Silver's less than gold. We're gonna say platinum. It's

Unknown: 18:01

when you turn the age on the year.

Kristen Daukas: 18:04

So if I can make it to 68 I'm having a platinum birthday party, and y'all are all invited.

Unknown: 18:09

I highly doubt I'm gonna see 2098 but

Kristen Daukas: 18:13

you had yours, you're able to to embrace it. So I guess that means so Sid's got to make it to Can't she can't even do it. She can't, she's she's screwed. She was born in 2001 she screwed Cassie too. So your dad and I are the only ones that have any chance left. But I do, I do agree with you on the fact of it does help for planning. It just seems so bossy to me. There just seems like a whole lot of bossiness. And I shouldn't say that word, because that's not, that's really, that has a bad connotation. There just seems like a lot of demands. Maybe that's not bossy. It's very demanding on and it's not the bride that's really orchestrating this. It's her maid of honor, or, you know, her bridesmaids that are kind of orchestrating this, but I think it's demanding.

Unknown: 19:04

I mean it, I agree, but I think it only if you're not giving me enough heads up, like if you text me three days before your wedding or before your bachelorette, that you want me to have seven different outfits per theme, response. But if you were dressing in all black, if you asked me four months beforehand, that's completely different story. You've given me more than enough time to put aside money to do it, you know, buy pieces here and there. Like, figure out what I'm going to execute on that, and I feel like that's appropriate, but I also think it's not like, this is what we're doing. It's how do you guys feel about doing this? Like, if you ask me how I feel about doing pink pony club on Friday night, and I'm like, Oh, that's a great idea. And half the other girls are like, No, I don't want to do that. Then, like, you need to also. Listen to your audience.

Kristen Daukas: 20:01

What is pink? What is the, what's the pink pony club?

Unknown: 20:05

It's like chapel Ron's thing. Like, just pink. Pink Pony Club. Like cowgirl, sparkly. Okay, all right, space, cowgirl, without the space. So I don't know, but it could be, it could be worse. There could it could be Bridezilla esque. And if you think about it, these trips are just photo opportunities. True. They really are. They're fun. They're fun. I went on a bachelorette in June, and it was so much fun. It was like a cabin kind of weekend. We went to the middle of North Carolina and had the best time ever. And we had, like, I think we did, like, like a kind of, like a country redneck kind of vibe. And then the other one was, like, super girly, like cottage core fairy kind of deal. And I luckily had some stuff, and was able to borrow some stuff from a friend. But then we did the T shirts where all of our faces were on it. So instead of one of the themes, the bride gave us all t shirts with our faces on it. And it was super cool. So, I mean, if all, I don't know how I would probably react to, like, a super, like, intense, strict voucher, having that been my first one, and being a being as great as it was, right, I hope they're,

Kristen Daukas: 21:38

I hope they're all like that. They're not going to be. You know that. And I know some of your I know some of your friends, so I can guarantee you they're not going to be like that. How much are these girls spending on not the one that you just went to, but you know, I know plenty of your other friends have been to the really crazy bachelorette type weekends. That's that's a lot of money. You guys are money that you don't have. I might add,

Unknown: 21:59

yeah, credit cards are great credit but they're not right. They are in those situations when you have to, like, drop a lot at one time, right? Trying to think of anyone that I know that's been on a intense voucher at

Kristen Daukas: 22:22

that's all right, that's all right.

Unknown: 22:27

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Kristen Daukas: 22:55

So let me ask you this, what are, what would you say are some of the biggest challenges that your generation faces. You know, whether it's economic, social, environmental, what are some of the biggest issues that you think that you're having to your group's having to deal with? We can we kind of touched on money?

Unknown: 23:11

Definitely, money. Yeah, for sure. And then also, like, for me right now, like you were saying, we hate to work. I hate working, but it's like something that we just have to do, like you said, we just have to do it like and the people we are working for do not want to adapt to society. They don't want to change. They don't want to be modern. They like

Kristen Daukas: 23:47

these. Talk about that. Talk about that. What do you mean?

Unknown: 23:52

These corporate companies are unaware that, like we know that there are other companies that we can go and work for that, adapt to like that, work from home, that flux, this flux schedule. I'm not saying like we all want work from home jobs, but we want the ability to be able to work from home without it being an issue. And I feel like, after covid, you know, work from home was huge, and then everyone was like, screw that. We're going back to in office seven days or five days a week. Like, you have to be there for X amount of hours, and it's hard, you know, some people have kids, some people have other jobs. Some people like, they have, you know, like, if you have an appointment, I have to, you still have to go into work, and then you have to leave early. And then you're, you're like, This is not, this is not conducive to my lifestyle. Pretty much, it's not

Kristen Daukas: 24:47

conducive to living. Is? It's very true. I mean, I think about the fact that, you know, I'm not gonna say I'm blessed because I worked my ass off to work for myself, right? Absolutely. But I know for sure that I would not be able to do things like i. Hey, I'm going up Wednesday to Sunday to visit you, right? And I'm still working. I mean, you've seen that. What you know, I'm working. I'm working in the morning so, and I agree with you, especially, even in your position, which is a very on site position, there's no reason why you can't work from home two days a week, exactly, you know, I'm not saying every day, because it's very, it is a very hands on thing, and definitely not days where you have events, that's, I mean, but you have, I don't think they give you guys enough credit to be able to, you know, use that. Remember when I was talking sometimes my biggest frustration with Gen Z is the lack of critical thinking. You You made the comment that you weren't even sure what that meant. That's critical thinking. That's saying, Okay, I've, here's my schedule this week. I have, you know, I've got office work on this day and this day I don't need to be in the office. However, I've got a big event on Tuesday and Thursday. That's critical thinking. That's going, you know, just taking an overview. And I you girls are my girls. You my my three hens are very good with critical thinking, but you were raised by me, right? There are definitely some of your generation that you just go, what are you thinking? Because you're not and what, and I've often said to one of my other little ribs with Gen Z, is your lack of sense of urgency, right? So, but I think that's more of a Kristen thing, because I'm just like, go, go, go, go, go, all the time. And you know, you guys have a different approach. So let's talk a little bit about your approach to work and life balance. And you know, you work to pay your bills, which most of us do. But I just, and I'm, I'm happy for y'all that you recognize that it's like the person I told you. I told you I ran into yesterday that you went to school with. One of the things I said, I said, good for you for recognizing that being a teacher, which was causing her so much stress, it was affecting her mentally and physically. I said, good for you for honoring yourself. Whereas my parents would have been like, you stay, you stay. You got to work, work, work, work, work. You know, unless you've got like, 105 degree temperature, you go in.

Unknown: 27:12

See, that's the thing. Is, there are other jobs out there that we can go and get. If I wanted to quit my job tomorrow, I would be fine. Would I be like, Oh, wow, I just did that. I would be fine, because I know that I could go down the street and get a bartending job or a serving job and make twice as much money, right?

Kristen Daukas: 27:30

Because everybody's getting drunk up in DC,

Unknown: 27:35

especially in my election year. One thing we do not lack is restaurants and bars. And yes, it is an election year, so that's going to be really interesting. And I like, do hope that I see the benefits of that in my position at my hotel, you know, small convention, small conferences with delegates coming in and out visiting so we'll see. Yeah. I mean, I think, I mean, I feel like I have, I have a sense of urgency, but that's because of the career path I've chosen. Like, you know, event planning, there has to be some sort of emergency, like situation, but I've always been that way, because being raised by you and you had it was, if I wanted to have a play date or sleepover with somebody, had to come to you with a plan. You're gonna take me there, they're gonna bring me home. And you'd be like, okay, because I remember too many times, I'd be like, Well, I don't know. I guess you're just gonna take me and pick me up. You'd be like, not happening. So then it was like, Well, I want this to happen, so let me try to make up. Make it work. When I was in high school, you're going to, you know, high school parties and whatnot, I always had an escape plan. As soon as we walked in, I was like, Where, if, if the police show up and bust this party? Where am I going? Where? What is my exit route? And do I know where I am? I definitely always knew where I was. I was very I'm not directionally challenged at all. So I feel like it definitely has sense of urgency, but I do understand what you're saying. I have a friend that has zero salt, zero urgency whatsoever for anything, and it takes her forever to get ready. And she's always like, I'm gonna be ready at 830 and like, you know, nine o'clock rolls around, she's like, Okay, now I'm ready. So, but I love her. She knows this. She's one of my best friends, so she's definitely gonna see this.

Kristen Daukas: 29:26

But we all have that friend, your aunt, Jen, can be that way. We, you know, if you can call it bpt, or we used to call it, you know, Jennifer time. I mean, you know, some people just, and it's not, it's, I think they are, they just kind of go, Okay, let me get this one more thing done, and then I'll go do this. So I call, you know, just one more thing syndrome. But you know, for people like us, who are always habitually early and on time, it'll make you crazy. It really will, until you just finally go, okay. I know this person is not going to. Yeah, if I say six, they're not gonna be ready. Seven Exactly, yeah, so.

Unknown: 30:07

And then you have like, Mimi, who you say, Come over at four. She's there at 230

Kristen Daukas: 30:11

Right? Which is why we tell her like 530 Yeah.

Unknown: 30:15

Oh my gosh, I don't know. I feel like the worst thing about my generation is probably we absolutely need immediate, like, gratification, like it has, like, I don't want to wait for something. I want it just there. I just want it there. That's why, like, I have this terrible habit of taking Ubers instead of taking the metro, because I don't want to have to change lines. I don't want to have to wait for the metro. I just want to press a button. A car comes, gets me and takes me to where I need to go. And it's cuts the time in half, if not more well,

Kristen Daukas: 30:47

if you can afford it, you know. I mean, the big theme of our mother daughter, theme of 2024 for us, has been budgeting, right? And, you know, going and, you know, getting a really clear understanding of, you know, and I'll say this, the one thing about your youngest sister, she's really good at that. She can, I mean, because she breaks it down to, okay, if I want a$500 camera, I need to work. She goes, I'll have to work for 20 hours. And so she, she's always thought that way. But you, you have gotten to be very good about that now too. You know, nobody likes Well, nobody likes working. We all work to pay our bills, but, and, you know, nobody likes working two jobs, but you do what you have to do to live the life you want to live. And I think you're a little happier, even though you're not crazy about, you know, the couple of shifts that you go into the bar. But isn't, isn't it a little bit easier now that you're not as stressed over

Unknown: 31:39

paying your bills? For sure. Yeah, absolutely.

Kristen Daukas: 31:44

All right, so we're coming in at the end a little bit. What is something that you want millennials, Gen X and Boomers, the ones that are still left, what is something that you think is very important, that they know about your generation? Stop

Unknown: 32:01

micromanaging us. You've already ruined our lives. Just kidding, no. But seriously, the micromanaging and also your employees are leaving you. They're not leaving the job. They love the job. They just cannot stand you. Unfortunately, that's that's the case.

Kristen Daukas: 32:20

That was some wise words said by your mom, right? People don't leave jobs, they leave bosses. And it's true, and it'll be true the rest of your life. I think you're doing a great job. I don't think you're in the right fit for your personality, but I think you're in the right industry, and you're gonna get there. All of you are gonna get there. Nice if you come across somebody in my generation or boomers that are going to tell you they had their shit together when they were 25 they're lying to you. They are lying to you. None of us did.

Unknown: 32:49

It's hard, you know, you see these people that are like, I see these people that are my age or younger, that are like, you know, having babies, having multiple babies, or getting married and like, buying like, you know, my having people that I know buying houses is so insane. I'm like, Oh my gosh. Like, what did I do that? I mean, we're the same, we're the exact same age. We grew up together. What did you do differently that I didn't that you're able to do what you're doing, but it's staying at home and buying in your you know, parents backyard, like, that's not something that I see for myself and like my future. Like, I would love to come back to North Carolina eventually, but most likely not five minutes from where I grew up. I'm a huge believer in like, you have to grow up outside of where your roots are. Like, you cannot be the person who you're supposed to be if you stay in the same hometown forever. How do you know that there's not something better for you out there? Because you never left, you never tried. And it's really sad, but also at the same time, it's like, I get it. I stayed at home till I was 22 and like, I know it sounds like you were only 22 like you were young, but for me, it was like I was 22 like living at home, like I should be gone, I should go and like, be a different person than I am from here, and I've seen it Change the people I'm friends with. I grew up with people that I'm no longer speak to, no longer friends with. I still wish them well. But then I have all these friends in DC that I've made. I've made so many great friends here. I've made so many connections here, that no matter where I go, I know I'm gonna have somebody that knows, somebody that's gonna be able to help me out. You know, get me a quick in and out, a quick job, you know. Or hey, can do, um, nowhere I should live in this area, whatever, wherever the case may be. And like I said, I have like, 10 friends from Winston, Salem, North Carolina, that live here in DC now, one of them being my longest known friend, known her since. Sixth grade and others that I've known since freshman year of high school and middle school, like it's an absolutely insane and I can vouch for them that they are not who I knew in Winston, like they're absolutely people, and absolutely I love each and every one of them so much and probably more than I did back in Winston, because we were all just like, it was just that was it all you had and all you had back home was each other. There was not really much to do, which is why we got in trouble so much. But like, out here, like, you just see people flourishing, and it's so it's nice. It's nice to see the success, successes. One of my best friends going from working government contracts to being an English teacher, which threw us all through a loop, but she loves it. She said, Yeah, it's stressful, but she loves it so well. And if

Kristen Daukas: 35:52

you remember when you were in high school and all the drama, because it was your class, the class of 2017, Man, y'all had all the drama. But I told you I was like, You think these people are important now, but I promise you, the day you graduate high school, you will maybe stay in touch with a handful of them, and you will never talk to the rest of them again unless you go to a reunion. And it's true, because it's those second stage. You know, some people make those friends in college. They're college friends, but it really are those people that you meet in that second city, or, you know, if you leave, but you know, the adult friends, right? And you're right, those are going to be the ones that are in your life forever. Yeah.

Unknown: 36:31

I mean, I didn't go to college, so I don't have college friends, but, like, I'm saying it's just that phase, you know? Yeah, I see my friends that have college friends that they like. Those are going to be them forever, but they also have some that change like them. They're like, I, you know, you have those horror stories, but I would say, I mean, for me, like these people that I'm meeting now would be the equivalent of my college friends. Absolutely no, it's later in life, but some of them will, I am more than confident will be in my life for the till the end, I would hope well

Kristen Daukas: 37:09

and you may get you probably won't all live in the same area. You know, after this, you know you'll all each launch into your own area, but you'll stay connected, and you're right, those you'll have those connections, and you'll have those friendships, and you'll meet up, and it'll be like, you might not see each other, but every two or three years, but they might be like, hey, Kenzie, I'm coming through Charlotte. You're like, come on, you know, type, so it is, and it makes me so happy to hear you say that, because, you know, when I did the same thing, but I went to Chicago, right? And people would say to me, we're, you know, where are you from? Or, you know, Where'd you grow up? Actually, that was always like, Where'd you grow up? And I would say I was born in North Carolina, but I grew up in Chicago. And I think you are, you and your sisters are living that piece of it right now. You were born here. Quote on you weren't, but you know what I mean, but that this is where you're growing up, this is where you're learning to be an adult, and how things work. And I'm even though I'm your mom, I'm a little biased. I'm super proud of you. I'm super proud of you, and I'm and your friends, even though I don't get to see all my little bonus kids that much anymore, but I love to hear their stories, you know, when you tell me about them. So I'm super proud of all of you. And I going to end this with the way I started it, which is to say, I love your generation. I think that your generation is going to be the savior of our world, because God knows, especially on the boomer side, you know, it is getting completely torn upside down right now. And I think you guys are kind of, you know, you're passionate, but you don't let it define you. Does that make sense? Yeah, I mean, I'm talking about, like, things that are going around.

Unknown: 38:47

We're definitely going to talk back absolutely,

Kristen Daukas: 38:52

absolutely and in a constructive way, not in the way that you used to do when you were 10. So no more. So like, you're going to push back. You're not going to take that, that that feel the way that

Unknown: 39:05

you're trying to make me feel. Like, why are you doing that? Like,

Kristen Daukas: 39:09

what's the point? Yeah, all right, well, I appreciate you taking time out of your busy single cat lady girl schedule, and to everybody out there, thank you for listening and tuning in and until we meet again. May your drinks and coffee be as strong as the will of your oldest daughter. Take care everybody. Bye, as the saying goes, you don't have to go home, but you can stay here, and that's a wrap for this week's episode. A big thanks to my guests for sharing their story and to you for listening. Don't forget to share the show with your friends and spread the words. And if you'd like to be a guest on the show, the link is in the show notes till next time cheers you.